Healing
Last Saturday, I was washing my car in the driveway because it was the last warm day we were going to have for awhile. In the course of cleaning the outside and inside of my car, the side of my wrist was gashed open on a bolt or something along the door frame of my little black SUV. Immediately, it began to bleed and sting rather considerably. Immediately, I went inside to wash off the blood, and clean up the wound to put a band-aid on it. The water hit it, and it hurt even worse. By the time I got to the part where I had to pull off the dead skin in order to put the band-aid on, that part of me was numb because the whole of my wrist was still ringing out with that pain. It wasn't fun. But I put the band-aid on, and it was tender for at least a day. Over the last week, slowly, with the help of care and medicine. my wound went through various stages of healing. Tenderness, scabbing over, itching, losing the scab and being very pink and tender again, and now it is healing up and showing signs of new skin growing over the wound and it doesn't hurt anymore.
Normally, I wouldn't go into an in-depth description of a personal icky wound. But this week, I've been thinking about healing and this seven day wound has really shown me. Earlier this year, I read a quote from Beth Moore that stated "Most of the wounds in our lives come through relationships, therefore most of our healing will come through relationships" - I'm finding that to be more and more true.
Not quite unlike the wound on my wrist, the painful, hurtful wounds of my past have gone through their own cycle of healing. And in the last year, I've discovered that just the same way a wound in our skin itches as it heals, so too, our hearts itch with healing when the time comes. I've seen God do some rather miraculous and wonderful healing in my life this year.
They don't hurt anymore, the past hurts. But the healing screams at me sometimes. There's a tangible evidence of healing. I never saw it before.
Today, two things I observed about me that showed me how far God's brought me. First of all, I discovered that someone I had considered a friend until just about four months ago, had blocked me on twitter. This was, to borrow a phrase, a preemptive strike against reconciliation. In the past, this kind of rejection would have broken me in two. I'd have cried myself to sleep. In this case, there was a peace that I've done what I can to attempt reconciliation (a la Romans 12:18) and was rejected before I even began. I let it go. yes, it made me sick to my stomach at first, and certainly saddened, but it did not break me. For that, I'm grateful. Somewhere I healed from that wound and fear.
The next thing was looking through my profile pictures on Facebook over the last two years. I did it to find a picture of my nephew, but I noticed something about the light in my eyes. Three years ago, before I moved here, there was a light in my eyes. Then, one of the hardest seasons in my life - relationally speaking - alighted on me. I noticed a slow death to that light in my eyes. The LIFE that was once there was gone. In the last year, I've seen, or rather, experienced fire ignited back in my smile. The light in my eyes was returned. More than the same light, it's brighter. There's something brighter about the me I see in the recent pictures. I don't understand it, but I know that somehow that is representative of the healing that's changed me.
The healing itches. It's screaming "it's growing" and I find that God has removed from me a heart of stone and replaced it with a heart of flesh. There's an aliveness to how I feel that I cannot hide.
Tonight I just have to say that I am thankful for healing.
Normally, I wouldn't go into an in-depth description of a personal icky wound. But this week, I've been thinking about healing and this seven day wound has really shown me. Earlier this year, I read a quote from Beth Moore that stated "Most of the wounds in our lives come through relationships, therefore most of our healing will come through relationships" - I'm finding that to be more and more true.
Not quite unlike the wound on my wrist, the painful, hurtful wounds of my past have gone through their own cycle of healing. And in the last year, I've discovered that just the same way a wound in our skin itches as it heals, so too, our hearts itch with healing when the time comes. I've seen God do some rather miraculous and wonderful healing in my life this year.
They don't hurt anymore, the past hurts. But the healing screams at me sometimes. There's a tangible evidence of healing. I never saw it before.
Today, two things I observed about me that showed me how far God's brought me. First of all, I discovered that someone I had considered a friend until just about four months ago, had blocked me on twitter. This was, to borrow a phrase, a preemptive strike against reconciliation. In the past, this kind of rejection would have broken me in two. I'd have cried myself to sleep. In this case, there was a peace that I've done what I can to attempt reconciliation (a la Romans 12:18) and was rejected before I even began. I let it go. yes, it made me sick to my stomach at first, and certainly saddened, but it did not break me. For that, I'm grateful. Somewhere I healed from that wound and fear.
The next thing was looking through my profile pictures on Facebook over the last two years. I did it to find a picture of my nephew, but I noticed something about the light in my eyes. Three years ago, before I moved here, there was a light in my eyes. Then, one of the hardest seasons in my life - relationally speaking - alighted on me. I noticed a slow death to that light in my eyes. The LIFE that was once there was gone. In the last year, I've seen, or rather, experienced fire ignited back in my smile. The light in my eyes was returned. More than the same light, it's brighter. There's something brighter about the me I see in the recent pictures. I don't understand it, but I know that somehow that is representative of the healing that's changed me.
The healing itches. It's screaming "it's growing" and I find that God has removed from me a heart of stone and replaced it with a heart of flesh. There's an aliveness to how I feel that I cannot hide.
Tonight I just have to say that I am thankful for healing.
Yay for healing and being healed. God is good.
ReplyDeleteThis is so beautiful, Amanda! Your writing is such a blessing to me. :-)
ReplyDeleteThis is gorgeouos and so true. Well said, my dear! ~ L
ReplyDelete